Merry Wanderer of the Night  + [YA]

Memory Monday: Girls Know Best...

I have this theory, that every young girl goes through one of two stages — One, where they are completely boy-crazy fan girls... These are the girls who, growing up, were sure they were going to marry that super hot guy in the BackStreet Boys. My elementary school best friend had both our weddings planned out — She was going to marry Nick Carter, and I could marry his younger brother Aaron and we would be sisters!! (Note, I was vehemently opposed to this idea. Aaron Carter did not interest me. At all)
The other type of girls were those who were convinced that girls were/are superior in each and every way to boys, and that they are mostly an annoyance to be borne. Now, these girls do not believe boys have cooties or are 'eeeww squeal icky!!' That belongs in the first category, because we generally outgrow the eww squeals to those girlish squeals we somehow think will get the boys to like us. Ahem... Group 2 might have really good friends who are boys, but they still think the girls are smarter. So, group 2 thinks the world would be significantly better run by females, that nothing a boy says could possibly be right if it contradicts what I'm saying and so on.
So, which type of girl was I? Well, today's memory is about a book titled Girls Know Best... Take a lucky guess.: P

Ashley was definitely the type who believed girls were way better than boys. When I saw this book pop up in the school book orders, I grabbed my babysitting money and bought it. I read it as soon as it arrived and I loved it! Here was a book filled with tips, tricks, trivia and so much more from girls just like me. I read it so many times! I could go on and on about all the things I 'learned' from this book (most of which I, thankfully, never used...) but I'm only going to tell one story today-
One of the sections of the book was a list of big words you can use in everyday conversation to sound smarter than you are. (Note — this almost never works... So be very careful using big words when you don't need too...) I don't remember very many of the words listed, but one of the words I do remember is 'masticate' (to chew). Say it out loud though, and go back to 9th grade and pretend you are a boy... What's it sound like? Uhu... Yup.
So, I'm sitting in 9th grade heath, and these two boys (neither of whom I particularly liked, although by this point I had outgrown my — "All-boys-suck-and-are-stupid-except-those-boys-that-are-my-friends-and-even-they-are-dumber-than-me" stage) walk up to a girl sitting next to me and start talking. I eavesdropped, both because I'm nosy (I admit it) and because knowing these boys, and knowing who they were headed to talk too, I doubted they were going to be saying anything nice. (I was right... [as always])
(Insert — I'm going to demonstrate my really freaky memory here... Y'all are going think I'm nuts that I can quote (pretty nearly word for word) a conversation I had/overheard as a 9th grader... [at this point, I think that's about 8 years ago... ] Don't judge: P)
Looking sly, the first boy said "Hey -----, do you masticate?" The girl had a disgusted look on her face, looked very uncomfortable, and tried to ignore the question. She said something along the lines of, "Ugh --- — Stop it. Just... Stop. Leave." Knowing they wouldn't leave her alone until they fully embarrassed her, I jumped into the conversation. I told them to walk away, to leave her alone. So, boy 2 said, "Why Ashley? Do you masticate?" I replied with, "Of course! I'm doing it right now!" (I was/am a big gum chewer). And boy 1 promptly whacked boy 2 on the arm and said, "Don't ask the smart kids!"
Thank you Girls Know Best! :P
Admittedly, the book is pretty useless to anyone expect group 2 girls, looking for a book to increase their feelings that girls really are better than boys. I still have my old copy, now battered and beaten from being over read, and I wouldn't mind trying to reread it someday, just to see how my more grown up eyes view it compared to my young girl eyes. Who knows, maybe I will still think that only girls rule.: P